Putting Your Affairs in Order

[tengallons]

The doctor, after an examination, sighed
and said, 'I've got some bad news. You have cancer,
and you'd best put your affairs in order.'

The woman was shocked, but managed to
compose herself and walk into the waiting room where her
daughter had been waiting.

'Well, daughter, we women celebrate
when things are good, and we celebrate when things don't
go so well. In this case, things aren't well. I have
cancer. So, let's head to the club and have a
martini.'

After 3 or 4 martinis, the two were feeling
a little less somber. There were some laughs and more
martinis. They were eventually approached by some of the
woman's old friends, who were curious as to what the two
were celebrating.

The woman told her friends they were
drinking to her impending end, 'I've been diagnosed
with AIDS.'

The friends were aghast, gave the woman
their condolences, and beat a hasty retreat.

After the friends left, the woman's
daughter leaned over and whispered, 'Momma, I thought
you said you were dying of cancer, and you just told your
friends you were dying of AIDS! Why did you do that??'

'Because I don't want any of those
bitches sleeping with your father after I'm gone.'

---------------

And THAT, my friends, is what is called,
"Putting Your Affairs In Order"!

[Hazard]

Originally Posted by tengallons

The doctor, after an examination, sighed
and said, 'I've got some bad news. You have cancer,
and you'd best put your affairs in order.'

The woman was shocked, but managed to
compose herself and walk into the waiting room where her
daughter had been waiting.

'Well, daughter, we women celebrate
when things are good, and we celebrate when things don't
go so well. In this case, things aren't well. I have
cancer. So, let's head to the club and have a
martini.'

After 3 or 4 martinis, the two were feeling
a little less somber. There were some laughs and more
martinis. They were eventually approached by some of the
woman's old friends, who were curious as to what the two
were celebrating.

The woman told her friends they were
drinking to her impending end, 'I've been diagnosed
with AIDS.'

The friends were aghast, gave the woman
their condolences, and beat a hasty retreat.

After the friends left, the woman's
daughter leaned over and whispered, 'Momma, I thought
you said you were dying of cancer, and you just told your
friends you were dying of AIDS! Why did you do that??'

'Because I don't want any of those
bitches sleeping with your father after I'm gone.'

---------------

And THAT, my friends, is what is called,
"Putting Your Affairs In Order"!

Women, una strong. No wonder a friend bears an AKA "Fear Woman"