Wanted: True Love

Does any one have any tips or pointer for me on how to find True love?.

I am a beautiful professional lady in my early thirties. I have a thriving career and comfortable financially for a single lady my age. I have also dated a few great guys, smart professional men whom I thought...

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[MrsChocT]

Originally Posted by lateesha

My dear, I agree with you to a large extent but truth be told,if a young woman desires to get married and she gets towards the mid thirties yet nobody has asked if she's offloading the merchandise or selling them,it's time to sit back and ask yourself what you may be doing wrong.
It may be possible that certain of her actions are repelling suitors,that is a possiblity.
Where does she live?
If she lives in a small quaint town with 10 Nigerian men 9.5 of whom are married and she wants to marry a Nigerian, her chances are almost nil.I don't suppose she'll be snatching someone's husband or praying for wives to die.
She may need to relocate to a place with a larger Naija community.
She can't for instance live in Boise Idaho and find a Nigerian husband (if that's her preference)

Bottom line, networking is important even in the House of God!

[Anike]

Originally Posted by .bebi

Im sorry but I don't agree with u.I am not Anonee but I definitely can relate.
I don't buy into what [Bob] wrote either about the best having been snapped up at college.Thats bullcrap to me.The best(whatever that may be)are being snapped up as we speak well into their 30s and beyond sef.
[...]
Its because of these nonsense set rules that chics desperately jump into the arms of any man that cares to propose,just to beat the "deadline" and end up either miserable or out in a few years.
[...]
I am all for living and loving your life while you wait for it to happen
[..]

I agree with you here .bebi. The implication that everyone who is married is "great"; has a good personality, is very far from the truth. Where I disagree with you is the notion that if it's not happening, one must resign to faith because it must mean that God has another agenda for one. I believe more in asking God for the vision to know what to desire, and for the strength to do what needs to be done to make your desire a reality. If it's not happening, maybe the approach is not right.

[Iye]

Originally Posted by lateesha

Where does she live?
.I don't suppose she'll be snatching someone's husband or praying for wives to die.

I smell fear in your voice don't mind me.

[lateesha]

Originally Posted by liloldlady

Sorry I am not going to join the folks, gushing over this post, with the "aawww you are great wait on your luck" Brigade.

Naa...

listen, the 'Boy-meets-Girl-market' is the most efficient market I know.
If you are as great as you have just stated, you would have met somebody just as great....32yrs(sorry I always attach a number to such descriptions as early this or late that) and waiting, is a very long time, on the biological clock.

There is obviously something you are not telling us? or maybe you don't know how important this thing is, or you have been minimising it.
when you stop being in denial....fess up, and we will help you lick this problem.

And voila, in 6months, you will be making a list, for your wedding invitation.

cheers.

Your opinion here may not be popular but it has some words of wisdom nevertheless.
Early 30s is not that old IMHO for a woman.
If by 35 (a few years) all she's done is date people who proceed to propose and marry other people then something is definitely not adding up somewhere.
The poster needs to hear this before she dates and dates and turns 40 then she may tempted to settle for anyman just to bear the title mrs.
The best time to marry is when you are young and men are falling at your feet.
After 35, and your chances of conception are dwindling some will even reject you from your photograph.
I have a friend in that situation now,I talked about it in the other anonee thread.
I've also come to find out that most men I know who are unmarried past 40 and women who are unmarried past 35 have a hand in their dilemma.
They are looking for perfection or someone to fit into a mold they've created.
Many of them are so rigid and set in their ways that there's no room for anyone else and the older they get,the worse it becomes.

[lateesha]

Originally Posted by Serious_Naijababe

Bottom line, networking is important even in the House of God!

Yes now
You pray and you position and re-position yourself strategically

[Auspicious]

Does any one have any tips or pointer for me on how to find True love?.

I am a beautiful professional lady in my early thirties. I have a thriving career and comfortable financially for a single lady my age. I have also dated a few great guys, smart professional men whom I thought were ideal partners. Only none has ended in that life long commitment that I seek.

Normally I don’t worry about my single status. But lately everywhere I turn, it is the story of some lady I know either closely or remotely getting engage or married that meets me. Two weeks ago, I arranged to meet a girlfriend I haven’t seen in a while and she was full of excitement and happily gushed out to me even before we sat at our table that she is engaged. I went to work last Friday and noticed my female colleagues squealing in excitement over something... and guess what, it was one of my colleague displaying her new engagement bling . Since then every where I turn and every one I meet has an engagement or newly married news to gist me.

This has got me thinking oh my god everyone is getting married. Why am I being left behind?. Why can’t I seem to find a decent handsome , smart professional man to settle with? Is there something I am doing wrong? If so I need advice on how to remedy this.

Babygurl how 'bout we start with yo number?

Flash it over to me sometime so I can holler

And lissen, girl, dontcha go catching a fever

Cuz you don't wanna set yosef up for disaster

Awon Agba ani k'a ye w'Esin Eleshin sare*

As per, in this life, different wares we carry

You marry cuz yu ready to take him to Daddy

And not because Iya Ijo sud'nly found a Hobby

So talk to me Ladygirl what you like in a Man?

You like 'em pretty or you just seek a male fan?

You know what I mean, to tell you "Yes You Can!"

Cuz all that you'd find as easy as a summer tan.

Talk to me girl, let me what it is in us you want

Cuz when I holler, I'd be asking what you got

Like I'd like to know if yous a Good Cook - NOT!

Or 'might wanna know if you're like wicked hot.

Whichever way Luv, you and I need like a chill pill

Cuz we don't want to begin a trip into life up-hill

Be easy, yo Knight may be marching down still

And he may be Ugly as Will, or Pretty as Seal.
---

*Don't measure your Speed with Another's Chariot

[Auspicious]

Originally Posted by lateesha

no wonder people were rushing me like October Rush

Muahahahahahaa!

You? YOU?

Heeehehehehehehe!

Auspicious.

[Auspicious]

Originally Posted by Anonymous Villager

.bebi luv you back? I am looking to hook up with you soon. I will take you off the market "efficiently". But will you marry a Yoruba man? I no dey chop run o! Na to chop tanda make you give me little juniors I dey.

LOL!
Look, nor go tohk wetin go make ya mout swell o!
Who are you to talk to my Bebi like dat?

Auspicious.

[Juno]

Originally Posted by Auspicious

Babygurl how 'bout we start with yo number?

Flash it over to me sometime so I can holler

And lissen, girl, dontcha go catching a fever

Cuz you don't wanna set yosef up for disaster

Awon Agba ani k'a ye w'Esin Eleshin sare*

As per, in this life, different wares we carry

You marry cuz yu ready to take him to Daddy

And not because Iya Ijo sud'nly found a Hobby

So talk to me Ladygirl what you like in a Man?

You like 'em pretty or you just seek a male fan?

You know what I mean, to tell you "Yes You Can!"

Cuz all that you'd find as easy as a summer tan.

Talk to me girl, let me what it is in us you want

Cuz when I holler, I'd be asking what you got

Like I'd like to know if yous a Good Cook - NOT!

Or 'might wanna know if you're like wicked hot.

Whichever way Luv, you and I need like a chill pill

Cuz we don't want to begin a trip into life up-hill

Be easy, yo Knight may be marching down still

And he may be Ugly as Will, or Pretty as Seal.
---

*Don't measure your Speed with Another's Chariot

Auspy!!!

With these rhymes, I'll be your October Rush!!

[lateesha]

Originally Posted by Auspicious

Muahahahahahaa!

You? YOU?

Heeehehehehehehe!

Auspicious.

What?
Imagine that my picture minus 45-50 pounds
lateesha was hot!
men were chasing me like flies on mango
I was the bomb in my hay days
even now sef ,I still dey get admirers

[.bebi]

Originally Posted by Balo

Balo could never write something like that! All these strange attacks on a perfect gentleman can be quite discombobulating.

E pele o!I don correct am.

[.bebi]

Originally Posted by Anonymous Villager

.bebi luv you back? I am looking to hook up with you soon. I will take you off the market "efficiently". But will you marry a Yoruba man? I no dey chop run o! Na to chop tanda make you give me little juniors I dey.

Randy Anonee,sending the luv right back at you
Won't mind hooking up,yoruba or not(been there done that)but the problem is Im not so brave when it comes to internet dating.

[.bebi]

Originally Posted by lateesha

My dear, I agree with you to a large extent but truth be told,if a young woman desires to get married and she gets towards the mid thirties yet nobody has asked if she's offloading the merchandise or selling them,it's time to sit back and ask yourself what you may be doing wrong.
It may be possible that certain of her actions are repelling suitors,that is a possiblity.
Where does she live?
If she lives in a small quaint town with 10 Nigerian men 9.5 of whom are married and she wants to marry a Nigerian, her chances are almost nil.I don't suppose she'll be snatching someone's husband or praying for wives to die.
She may need to relocate to a place with a larger Naija community.
She can't for instance live in Boise Idaho and find a Nigerian husband (if that's her preference)

I agree with you but then again,I know loads of girls that live and work in Lagos with its mighty Naija male dominated population and yet are still single.What say ye about that?And they are not runs girls o or bad people.
Bottomline is God's ways are not our ways.
In this my London where people warn you that husband no dey,friends of mine have met and married Naija men.

[.bebi]

Originally Posted by Anike

I agree with you here .bebi. The implication that everyone who is married is "great"; has a good personality, is very far from the truth. Where I disagree with you is the notion that if it's not happening, one must resign to faith because it must mean that God has another agenda for one. I believe more in asking God for the vision to know what to desire, and for the strength to do what needs to be done to make your desire a reality. If it's not happening, maybe the approach is not right.

But where you have been praying and fasting and networking nko and its still not gelling,wouldn't it be wise to sit back and really ponder whether its actually what God wants of u at this time or whether He wants u to devote your time to other things?
Just asking

[Auspicious]

Originally Posted by Juno

Auspy!!!

With these rhymes, I'll be your October Rush!!

..and you're hereby rushed - octoberly!

Auspicious.

[.bebi]

Originally Posted by lateesha

Your opinion here may not be popular but it has some words of wisdom nevertheless.
Early 30s is not that old IMHO for a woman.
If by 35 (a few years) all she's done is date people who proceed to propose and marry other people then something is definitely not adding up somewhere.
The poster needs to hear this before she dates and dates and turns 40 then she may tempted to settle for anyman just to bear the title mrs.
The best time to marry is when you are young and men are falling at your feet.
After 35, and your chances of conception are dwindling some will even reject you from your photograph.
I have a friend in that situation now,I talked about it in the other anonee thread.
I've also come to find out that most men I know who are unmarried past 40 and women who are unmarried past 35 have a hand in their dilemma.
They are looking for perfection or someone to fit into a mold they've created.
Many of them are so rigid and set in their ways that there's no room for anyone else and the older they get,the worse it becomes.

Lateesha, I agree with u.I have said it somewhere on this website before about people being more stoic in their ways the older they get.
I hope I haven't got to that stage myself.

[Auspicious]

Originally Posted by lateesha

I was the bomb in my hay days..

..and I guess it's a different story these days..
Auspicious.

[Spicey]

Av, have you tried to relocate? it may not be easy but there is this adage that says, one does not watch the masquerade at a spot. Above all take to God in prayer

[Lingo]

AV1

Bebi and SNB couldn’t have said it better. They both echoed my thoughts exactly.
I completely identify with all you have said but I would advise you step away from all these photogenic ‘marriages’.
Age, in my opinion is not a yardstick by which milestones should be measured. So what if Miss A met and married the love of her life at 25, good for her, it doesn’t mean you’re better or worse than she is. It was just her time at 25 to be married.
There is no point getting depressed over something you have little control over and if you find it is becoming incessantly disheartening, start approaching men or even try internet dating.

The wise people in the village have given you pointers on meeting someone but I must say you should read and re-read SLB’s post.

As for those who say once you’re over 30 and you don’t have men throwing themselves at your feet, I say, don’t be moved. Some women only got asked out by the one they eventually married, it’s all about meeting the right one.

If you are all you claim to be, celebrate it and most importantly, know who you are in God, by that, you won’t be moved by what people say. Learn to love and appreciate yourself. I am in my 30s too, single, and got a good career to God’s glory but will not settle for any man no matter what I see going on around me. It does take inner strength but I believe that we can do all things through Christ…..Apologies if you are not a Christian; I am only speaking from what I know.

Above all, pray! Not just for a good husband but for God to make you the answer to someone’s prayer too.

All I have said is what I have adopted and I am happier for it to God’s glory.

[Babine]

@topic

Please....just a piece of advice...you don't have to take it O!

I have noticed something around here.....

It looks like you are one of those 2003-2005 set of 'maidens' in waiting....and the odds are not in your favour.

You see, like we have in Nigeria....age for a woman is everything......same here on NVS......is you carry a 2003, 2004, 2005....or 2006 badge of membership....it becomes difficult to settle down......I don't know if it is a curse sha.

As you can see only the young 'fresh' ones get married like 2007.....2008 or better still 2009 set.....

People are already calculating how many "villagers" you may have "hooked" up with for the past 4-6 years....without snagging one to the altar.

Just go and register another moniker and become a freesssssssssssssh blood huh?...NVS is not different....Old dudes here prefer 'the young' gals......dem go just dey shag you dey troway you inside re-cycle bin.......or best case scenario....you will become a moderator and a bride on one Nigerian website yet to be established....

See the new babes like "Spicey"......"Iye"....."the Duchesss"....."Royal Palm"......"asanail"....those are sharp-sharp babes.....


No amount of 'prayer' request will solve that problem if you keep a 2003-2005 membership "old layer" logo with you....even with anonee handle....you know some of us have super x-ray vision kwa nu?


Anyway......take heart.....marriage is not everything. If as a female....you did not snag a beta Naija dude. by age 25....max age 27.........sorry...only pychotic remnants are remaining o! Unless you wanna share tampons with some other 'pussies' other one man's roof.

Or just become a 'born-again'....one pastor will find you extremely desirable.......

Good luck O!

All the best...