How is it possible to be married and yet feel all alone? I love my wife dearly but I guess she has sworn never to be truly content or happy with me unless we have financial success. She finds anything and everything to occupy her every waking moment, so long as she does not have to engage me. Engage me? Have a heartfelt talk, spend time showing her love to me, showing in very little ways that she cares. Knowing when someone truly cares about you does not require rocket science. I don't ask for much, never have never will. All I would like to see is that she cares, but focusing on what we don't have prevents her from appreciating the blessings we have. She loves me yet finds it easy to be intolerant and impatient with me. Her beef is not with me but God and until God chooses to make her realize that she is blessed and a blessing. Nothing I say or do can or will bring her closer to this truth. This is a very painful journey for me because try as I may, nothing will bring the will of God any closer than at its appointed time. So I pray him to bless me with the spirit of patience, tolerance and long-suffering. I pray he holds me because I am weak and he is strong. I am filthy and he clean. My journey has been long and arduous. I am battle weary and have little or no strength left in me, but I know this is not my fight. It is God's fight, so I know he has fought and conquered for me. There is no greater joy for a person in love, other than when you look into the eye of your beloved you see a reflection of your love: Your true worth in gold, priceless, irreplaceable and held in high esteem. I long to see these in the eye of my beloved. Words are empty. Actions priceless. Intentions? The road to hell is definitely paved with good intentions. Heaven is full of good actions. Looking at ones beloved, one sees them warts and all and love still chooses to love and stay. Love is a weakness, but truly a strength. I have been sequestered in the city of love and held captive in the prison of my own loving heart. Escape is not an option, neither is freedom desired. I of my own freewill within God's will, choose to be held captive that is until or unless she chooses to set me free. But, if I were to be set free, I would still be a prisoner; as I am my own jailer.